The other day at work, I was dealing with a situation with one of my new hires, which was new for me. I was clutching my hidden pearls because I wasn't ready. Now, your girl here, I know my role; however, this was an area I had yet to experience. Let me tell you, shit got real, and I could relate to how she felt, but I also had to discuss accountability. So I had a conversation, and I told her that she has to be the driver and allow our insured to be the passenger while she's taking her calls because if not, she will lose control which made me think about life. How many of us allow others to drive our lives while we become passengers?
When you drive, you are in control of not only the vehicle but where you are going. If you have children, you make sure their seat belts are on. You throw your purse or bookbag on the seat or floor, whichever you prefer. You put your keys in the ignition, check your mirrors, and put the car in drive or reverse. One of the most important things to do besides ensuring everyone is safe before taking off, prayers included, is to turn on the music. I have to have music while driving; that's a non-negotiable, and if you are riding with me, don't dare turn it. Drivers are attentive and pay close attention to the things around them to avoid accidents while having tunnel vision, but somehow, passengers think they are the drivers.
Passengers are two types of people, one that isn't legally able to drive or chose not to be in control of the vehicle that day. The good thing about being a passenger is you don't have to worry about anything during the ride unless the driver asks. For instance, grab something from your bag, or hand you a Kleenex or an aux cord. The one thing in 38 years of life I've known a passenger to do while being driven around is to critique and have demands. For example, how often someone gets in the car, and you hear you are going too fast or watch out for that car? The other thing is they want to know how long it will be before they reach their destination, whether they can make stops, why it's too hot or cold, and what is on the radio. In most cases, the driver will let you know it's their vehicle and, if you are going to complain, figure out another way to get to your destination. The driver, at that moment, establishes who is in control because they choose not to hand it over.
We often value the opinions of others too much and find ourselves being people pleasers. We seek guidance from them; however, we already know what to do. The keys to our lives are thrown in their hands as we permit them to drive something not even registered in their names. The bad thing is those people don't have control over their cars(themselves). Yet we are stuck when it's time to make decisions on our own because we are used to the guidance of others. The reason is that some people simply like being passengers and not drivers. They don't want to have to figure out what it takes to reach their destination because it's so much that has to happen from start to end. Don't get me wrong, the person in the car with you can help you with small things, but your decisions will determine how soon you get to the destination.
In conclusion, we must take the keys back to our lives and be drivers. We don't need permission from anyone to do what we have within ourselves to get to our destination. Stop allowing people to control your temperature, judge what you are doing, and put timelines on your journey when they are not in control of their destination. It's okay to say can you hand me a napkin at times but remind yourself that you are still in control. If you have to turn off the music to drown out the noise, it's okay. The place you are going is for you, and those on the ride; can either enjoy it or get out of the car. Let God be your guide, and know if you decide to hand over the keys, don't get mad when your destination gets delayed.
I challenge you to ask yourself these questions!
Are you allowing others to control you, or are you handing over the keys?
Do you know when you are being driven by others?
How can you take the keys back to your life?